A Man Asked His Sick GF to Meal Prep for Him After Her Chemo Treatments & Reddit Is Gobsmacked

Many couples find value in identifying and discussing their love languages, but this terminology is no excuse for disrespectful behavior. Take it from this poor Redditor, who is currently battling cancer and her boyfriend’s unrealistic expectations for “acts of service” in their relationship as she undergoes grueling chemotherapy treatments.

Writing in the infamous /AmITheAsshole Subreddit, user @Felfeyyy provided some context: She (31F) has a rare cancer called synovial sarcoma and has been undergoing regular rounds of chemo since January. “I do 8 hours in the cancer center, 5 days a week, every three weeks,” she wrote. “Treatments are very taxing on my body — mostly nausea and extreme fatigue among other side effects.”

The night before her most recent chemo cycle, @Felfeyyy’s boyfriend (24M) asked her if she would meal prep a week’s worth of meals for him. She was hesitant, and rightfully so — the last thing anyone in her shoes should feel obligated to do is cook for another fully grown adult. Still, her boyfriend is “sensitive” and prone to fighting, so she approached his request thoughtfully.

“I said it would depend how I feel, but I thought it would be better if I did it in a week and half when I felt recovered from this chemo cycle,” she explained. “He was insistent and kept asking if I could ‘just try’ and wasn’t taking no for an answer. I started to become agitated because if I’m being honest, I want to feel coddled and taken care of during this time in my life, not pushed to do chores. It’s not as if he was asking for a single meal; he wanted his entire week’s worth of food made by me after being in the hospital for 10 hours.”

@Felfeyyy’s pushback was even more understandable when you consider her boyfriend’s lifestyle: As she explained, he works mornings and gets out early in the afternoon, so he definitely has time to cook for himself.

“I think his point is that he still wants to be taken care of as well,” she continued, “which is understandable, but it’s not as if I never do anything for him. Whenever he is at my place, I offer any food I have on hand, will cook meals, or make a sandwich depending on the day. I rub and massage him when we are on the couch, ask about himself and his life, etc. In other words, it’s not like our entire lives are about me and my sickness.” (For the record, if their entire lives were about her sickness, that would be totally valid. Cancer is hellish, and anyone who’s suffering from this illness deserves ample care and attention.)

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