The real reason dating has gotten so much harder over the last decade

Almost half of U.S. adults agree: Dating has gotten more difficult over the last 10 years! And according to the most recent survey on dating from the Pew Research Center, women are more likely than men to have negative experiences, with nearly four in 10 reporting they’ve been on dates with people who pressure them for sex. In fact, 65 percent of women say they’ve endured harassing behaviors, from touching that makes them feel uncomfortable to receiving unwanted sexually explicit photos. It’s no wonder, then, that women are twice as likely as men to attribute dating’s decline to increased physical and emotional risk. As for the men? They’re more likely to blame technology for their dating woes.

Explains Bruna Nessif, author of Let That S*** Go and founder of TheProblemWithDating.com, “If his response to #MeToo is #NotAllMen, or he tries to tackle the concept of toxic masculinity by only further proving its existence through his actions, then he can just yell into the abyss, because I will be nowhere near him” (via HuffPost). Adds human sexuality expert Emily Morse, host of the “Sex with Emily” podcast, “I will not date men who haven’t done their emotional work. It’s a deal breaker if you haven’t seen a therapist, done any sort of self-reflection, or don’t have experience taking responsibility in past relationships. I need to be with someone who is driven and focused on self-growth.” 

Here's what's really a deal breaker when it comes to dating

On the upside, the Pew Research Center found that today’s singles are typically more open to dating people of different religions, races, and ethnicities, allowing them to cast a wider net. Different socioeconomic status also doesn’t seem to be a major deal breaker, with 86 percent saying they are open to seeing someone who makes significantly less money and 97 percent giving the nod to someone who makes significantly more. However, carrying a lot of debt was a serious turnoff for almost half of respondents, ranking just behind living far away as a top deal breaker.

“Not discussing your financial situation might be fine for a short-term fling,” observes Self Lender CEO James Garvey (via CNBC). Garvey’s company found that people typically wait about six months before discussing their debt. However, he explains, “if you want a long-term, committed relationship, you have to open up about your money and get on the same page financially.”

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